If you’ve ever wondered what role a Sex Coach plays in the divorce process, you’re not alone. Today, Myisha Battle’s pulling back the curtain on how their expertise can support you every step of the way.

Can you introduce yourself—your name, title, and the work you do?

My name is Myisha and I'm a clinical sexologist and dating coach. I work with clients to help them clarify what they want from intimate partnerships and get it. This includes goal-setting, holding my clients accountable, and supporting them as they explore the often fraught and taboo subject of sex. Sometimes I am the first step in my clients' long process of re-learning themselves as a single person. I help them understand past patterns that no longer serve them and help them dig deep as they envision what future sexual partnerships could look like. My practice is inclusive and I believe that everyone is entitled to the type of sex life they desire.

What drew you to this profession, and why do you specialize in divorce?

I have always been interested in sex and have developed the skill of being able to talk openly and honestly about it without judgement. This is a skill I model for my clients as they unpack shame and sex negativity that can often hold them back in their intimate partnerships. I believe that sexuality is our birthright and love the ability to work with people undergoing major life transitions. Many of my clients need support navigating dating and sex while separated or divorced, which is a particular life transition that can feel isolating. I love being a sounding board for people who are re-entering dating at a time that may look and feel very different from when they were single before.

What exactly does a Sex coach do during the divorce process?

I help my clients understand how and when they want to date while going through or post-divorce. This might include helping them craft dating profiles, using dating apps with more confidence, or building strategies for dating at a later time when their relationship with their ex is more settled. I also support those who are in new sexual relationships and struggling to communicate their needs or who recognize that they want something different from the sexual dynamic they left in their marriage. It's important to me to center my client's needs and meet them wherever they are, whether that's already dating and sex or simply wanting to talk about and explore the idea.

What are the biggest misconceptions people have about your role?

People often think that working with a sex coach will just be about the mechanics of sex. In reality, we discuss what you think and feel about your sexuality and look at any patterns or behaviors you'd like to change in your romantic dynamics. We do get into the nuts and bolts of sex when needed, but sex coaching is so much more than that—it's a chance to prioritize yourself and your needs as a sexual person.

At what stage in divorce should someone consider working with a Sex coach?

I'm comfortable supporting clients through any and all stages of divorce. I have worked with separated clients, and those post-divorce. I have also worked with clients who are contemplating divorce because of a sexual misalignment in the relationship. During a consultation call we can discuss this further so I can assess your unique circumstances and determine whether sex coaching is right for you at this time.

What are the top ways you help clients during divorce?

Some areas where I can help clients include: dating, understanding your sexuality, learning how to prioritize your sexual needs, navigating non-monogamy, unpacking shame, learning your sexual values, exploring the root causes of low desire, navigating peri/menopausal changes to sex, embracing gender or orientation changes, and balancing dating and co-parenting responsibilities.

How does working with you make the process less overwhelming or stressful?

My practice is very focused. We meet every two weeks for an hour via Zoom for three months, so appointments aren't overwhelming. You'll get homework assignments to do on your own between sessions. Each time we meet we'll recap how things went and discuss any new developments in your sex and/or dating life. You'll be actively taking steps towards your goal without feeling like it's one more thing on your to-do list.

What outcomes do your clients usually experience after working with you?

The majority of my clients express that they no longer feel sexual shame and that they felt supported in a nonjudgmental way by me. Many of my clients develop valuable dating skills, learn how to navigate things like being ghosted and dating anxiety. My clients also look back on the goals they set for our work together and report that they've either achieved everything or feel like they are on the path to getting there.

What’s one example of how your work has made a big difference in someone’s divorce journey? (You can share generally, no personal details needed.)

My clients learn how to date again, sometimes after several decades of being married. They learn valuable dating skills and how to be better about communicating their needs and boundaries. I've helped several divorced clients navigate casual dating in ways that align with their values. And I've helped many divorced clients find partners with whom they began long-term relationships.

What’s one piece of advice you’d give someone thinking about hiring a Sex coach?

Credentials matter. Anyone can call themself a coach, regardless of their training. I have a Masters in psychology and a sex coach certification from Sex Coach U. I have more training in the field of sexology than most doctors or therapists receive. I've also done work to understand my own biases, which is so important when working in such a changed field.

How do you collaborate with other divorce professionals to support clients?

I love collaborating with other practitioners who work with my clients. Often, my clients will have a personal therapist and others who are providing their expertise as my clients go through challenging times. The opportunities I've had to work with other professionals has been helpful for me as a practitioner and fruitful for my clients.

Thank you Myisha for sharing your wisdom and experience with the Fresh Starts community! You can learn more about their work by checking out Myisha’s profile below!

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