The Best 60/40 Custody Schedules for Kids Ages 5–13: Options, Examples, and What Research Says
When parents share custody, one of the most important decisions is how to structure the parenting schedule. A 60/40 custody arrangement means one parent has the children about 60% of the time and the other about 40%. This setup is common when both parents want significant involvement but practical factors like work schedules, distance, or stability during the school week make an exact 50/50 split challenging.
But what does a 60/40 custody schedule actually look like in real life? And which patterns work best for children between the ages of 5 and 13? Let’s explore the most popular schedules, why they’re recommended, and how they support children’s mental health.
Why 60/40 Custody Can Work Well for Families
Research consistently shows that children do best when they have regular, meaningful time with both parents—as long as both homes are safe and conflict is kept low. Shared parenting (including 60/40 plans) gives kids:
Strong relationships with both parents, not just one “weekend parent.”
Predictable routines, which are crucial for school success and emotional regulation.
Reduced stress, when transitions are well-planned and conflict is minimized.
Balanced parenting roles, so both parents share everyday responsibilities like homework, activities, and bedtime—not just “fun” time.
A 60/40 plan can strike the right balance: one home provides more of the weekday rhythm while the other still has extended, consistent time for bonding.
Common 60/40 Custody Schedule Options
1. The 4–3 Weekly Split
How it works: One parent has the children four consecutive nights (often Monday–Thursday), and the other has three (Friday–Sunday).
Why it works:
Only two transitions per week, which reduces stress.
Consistent weekdays with one parent help younger kids stay grounded in school routines.
Weekends with the other parent provide extended quality time.
Best for ages: 5–9, who benefit from shorter blocks and fewer handoffs.
2. The Extended Weekend Schedule
How it works: The 40% parent has the children every Friday after school through Monday morning.
Why it works:
Predictable weekends make planning simple.
The 40% parent enjoys three consecutive nights, which strengthens connection.
The 60% parent provides weekday consistency for school and activities.
Best for ages: 5–13, especially families who want one “school-week anchor” home.
3. 4–3 Plus a Rotating Midweek Overnight
How it works: Start with a 4–3 split. Every 2–3 weeks, the 40% parent adds one school-night overnight.
Why it works:
Balances responsibilities so both parents handle school-related routines.
Works well as kids grow older and can manage an extra transition.
Best for ages: 8–13, who can handle slightly more complex schedules.
4. School-Year vs. Summer Adjustments
How it works: During the school year, stick with a stable 4–3 or extended weekend plan. In the summer, shift to longer blocks—such as alternating weeks or extended stays with the 40% parent—to balance the year at 60/40.
Why it works:
School routines stay predictable.
Summer allows longer quality time without disrupting learning.
Best for ages: 5–13, especially families with busy extracurricular schedules.
5. Activity-Anchored Schedules
How it works: The parenting plan is built around the child’s regular activities. For example, the 40% parent may always cover swim-team Mondays and two weekends per month.
Why it works:
Ensures children keep consistent access to friends, teams, and hobbies.
Flexibility supports older kids’ independence and social life.
Best for ages: 10–13, who need stability in activities and peer groups.
Age-Based Considerations for 60/40 Custody
Ages 5–7: Young kids thrive on predictability and fewer transitions. Stick with simple patterns like 4–3 or extended weekends.
Ages 8–10: Kids can handle a bit more variety. Adding a midweek overnight can help the 40% parent share weekday routines.
Ages 11–13: Tweens and early teens want input and flexibility. Seasonal adjustments or activity-based schedules often work best at this stage.
Mental Health Benefits of the Right Custody Schedule
Choosing the right schedule is not just about logistics—it directly impacts kids’ well-being. The most important mental-health factors are:
Low conflict: More than the exact schedule, minimizing parental conflict is the strongest predictor of good outcomes.
Consistency: Kids need predictable routines for sleep, homework, and family time.
Involvement from both parents: When both parents share “real life” responsibilities, children feel secure and supported.
Flexibility as kids grow: Schedules should be revisited every couple of years to adapt to children’s changing needs.
Practical Tips for Making 60/40 Custody Work
Use school drop-offs/pick-ups for transitions to reduce stress.
Keep a shared digital calendar so kids know where they’ll be.
Align household rules—bedtimes, screen time, and homework—to provide stability.
Plan holidays and vacations in advance to keep the year balanced.
Review your plan annually to adjust for school, activities, or your child’s changing needs.
Final Thoughts
A 60/40 custody schedule can be a healthy, child-centered solution for families with kids ages 5–13. Whether you choose a 4–3 split, an extended weekend, or a seasonal adjustment, the key is consistency, cooperation, and keeping the child’s needs first. When done thoughtfully, 60/40 custody supports children’s mental health, academic success, and strong bonds with both parents.