Crying in the Car Counts: Realistic Emotional Self-Care During Divorce
Let’s be real: during divorce, everything feels like too much. The paperwork. The parenting. The pretending you’re okay when your whole life is changing. It’s not just the big stuff that’s overwhelming—it’s the constant mental load, the emotional whiplash, the thousand tiny decisions that pile up every day.
And when you’re that depleted, the idea of “self-care” can feel laughable. Like, sure, I’ll just pop into a yoga retreat between court dates and custody exchanges.
But here’s the truth I wish more people said out loud: crying in the car counts as self-care. So does eating toast in bed. So does canceling plans. So does putting on moisturizer just because it feels nice.
What Is Emotional Self-Care During Divorce, Really?
Emotional self-care during divorce isn’t about escaping your feelings—it’s about tending to them gently. It’s learning how to hold yourself when everything else feels like it’s falling apart. And it doesn’t have to be big or beautiful or even consistent. It just has to be yours.
Examples of Realistic Emotional Self-Care:
Crying in the car and not apologizing for it
Texting “I can’t talk but I need support” to a trusted friend
Writing one sentence in a journal before bed
Watching the same comfort show on repeat (again)
Letting yourself feel numb without shame
Drinking water and calling it a win
Why Crying in the Car Matters
We cry in the car because it’s private. Because we can’t fall apart in the house, or in the office, or in front of the kids. It’s a pause between pretending and surviving. And sometimes, that’s the only moment we have to actually feel what’s happening.
Let that moment be enough.
Tears are not weakness. They are your body releasing what it can’t hold anymore.
You Don’t Have to Fix It All to Care for Yourself
One of the hardest parts of divorce is the pressure to “keep it together.” You might feel like you need to be strong all the time. But the most powerful thing you can do is let yourself fall apart safely—on your terms.
That’s what emotional self-care really is:
Permission. Softness. Space.
Even if it’s just five minutes in the front seat of your parked car.
Three Tiny Emotional Self-Care Ideas You Can Try Today
If you don’t know where to start, try one of these:
Name one feeling out loud. “I feel overwhelmed.” That’s enough.
Put a post-it somewhere with one reminder: “You’re doing your best.”
Breathe in while saying, “I’m safe.” Breathe out and say, “I don’t have to do it all right now.”
You’re Not Alone
If you’re reading this with tears in your eyes, I want you to know: I see you. I’ve been you. You are doing the best you can with what you have.
Self-care during divorce doesn’t have to be glamorous. It just has to be honest.
And crying in the car? That’s more than enough.